Rest and Relaxation - Or Not
by blizzard5441
Summary: Hermione wants a break from the press, and Ron's willing to go along. Harry just wants a break. But Harry himself once said that he doesn't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds him.
1. Prologue

**a/n: Beware: this was brought on by extreme boredom. Should make you laugh. Or at least stare in confusion. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: Last I checked, my name isn't J.K. Rowling. Sorry, people. However, I did make up a spell or two.**

Prologue

 _Somewhere in the Caribbean Sea, on a remote island:_

The night was warm. The sea lapped gently against the sandy beach. Stars twinkled overhead. It was the perfect tropical night. Not a cloud anywhere in the sky. Palm tree leaves rustled in a gentle breeze. But there was no one around to enjoy this perfect night. Or so it seemed.

Shrouded in a cloak, a figure appeared in the distance, running across the beach. The figure reached a spot, looked around, then pulled off its hood. It was a man, with dark hair and the beginnings of a beard. Quite ordinary, it would seem on first glance. But this man was anything but.

He pulled from beneath his cloak a piece of fruit, which he set on the sand in front of him. Then, he leveled his wand at the lone piece of fruit. It was here. The day he had dreamed of for so long.

He exhaled, and murmured, " _Pinfrutus Pugnato."_

The fruit shuddered, then began to multiply itself, until the beach was covered with thousands and thousands of them. An observer might have thought that a plane had lost its cargo, but that was simply not the case.

The fruit now seemed to be mutating. Tiny, twig-like arms and legs were sprouting from the fruit, and a thousand pairs of luminous, mischievous eyes began to glow through the darkness.

The man grinned. The time had come.

 _London, England:_

"I know exactly what we need," pronounced Hermione.

"And what might that be?" asked Ron. He was sitting at the table with Harry playing a round of wizard's chess. Harry had gotten quite good since their days at Hogwarts, and could now give Ron a run for his money. He had even beaten Ron once, but that was when Ron was sick with the flu and hadn't had the energy to focus as he normally would.

"A vacation."

"A what?" said Harry and Ron together.

"A vacation. We've been followed around by the press everywhere since we defeated Voldemort, and it's starting to wear all of us down. And goodness knows I could do with a change of scenery. We'll travel the world, see some new places, and when we get back, it'll all have died down enough for us to get jobs and continue with our lives."

Harry prodded a rook across the board, forcing one of Ron's knights to hastily retreat. "You know," he said slowly, "that's not actually a bad idea."

Ron was nodding, looking thoughtful. "I've always wanted to see the Caribbean," he said.

"Let's go there, then," said Hermione, happy that Ron and Harry had liked the idea as much as she did. "I'll start preparations tonight."

 **a/n: There's the prologue. Guess what: it's multiple chapters! This is my first attempt at a non-one-shot story, so here goes. This is absolutely not the weirdest part - it gets better. And, as usual, reviews help my stories get better. So leave one, please and thank you.**


	2. Chapter 2

p class="MsoNormal"emSomewhere in the Caribbean, midafternoon:/em/p  
p class="MsoNormal"The sun shone. The palm trees swayed gently in a slight breeze. A cerulean sky stretched out to meet a terrifically blue ocean. It was the most picturesque day one could imagine./p  
p class="MsoNormal"At Accio Caribbeana, the most popular wizarding getaway in the Caribbean Sea, plenty of people were out enjoying the beautiful afternoon. A group of teenagers hit a volleyball back and forth in the breakers, and further out, two wizards were testing out some Muggle surfing tricks. One forty-year-old woman sat on a lawn chair near an unusually thick stand of palm trees, sipping an iced tea and enjoying a novel./p  
p class="MsoNormal"The casual observer would have deemed it the perfect beach day, but all was not as it seemed./p  
p class="MsoNormal"The woman by the palm trees suddenly looked up from her book and peered at the stand of trees. From a distance, nothing appeared out of place. She blinked a few times, shrugged, set her drink down on a small table next to her, and continued to read her book./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Suddenly, a small, pineapple-shaped figure darted out from behind a tree and scurried under the lawn chair. It was quickly followed by two more. The figures paused, and then began to form a pyramid by the woman's drink. Toe topmost one reached out and grabbed the glass with tiny hands, then hopped up onto the table. The lady was so engrossed in her book that she didn't see anything (however quiet the mysterious visitors may have been.)/p  
p class="MsoNormal"The other two – emthings/em, for lack of a proper name – hopped up alongside the first. They all got hold of the glass, then proceeded to fly up into the air, hover above the poor lady's head, and dump its contents all over her lap./p  
p class="MsoNormal"The woman screamed as she was doused in iced tea. Everyone in the vicinity turned to see her, drenched in tea, with three hovering pineapples over her head. The pineapples cackled in a most un-pineapple-like way, then zoomed back off into the trees./p  
p class="MsoNormal" /p  
p class="MsoNormal"stronga/n: Guess who's been procrastinating? Me! In my defense, sports seasons are hard. But hey, I finally got this up. I am proud of myself. As you can see, it is quite light and not at all sensible. Thanks, Boooklover. It you don't like it, go find some rainbow penguins. If you do - please leave a review! (Feel free to leave a review if you don't like it either. That way my writing gets better.)/strong/p  
p class="MsoNormal" /p 


End file.
